JAYVANBAMAFAN: PRAYER, QUOTES, & DESIGNS FOR TUE 4-26-11

Well, lets start off today with a prayer. Dear LORD, please bless everyone reading this right now, and bless their friends and families. Amen.
I have been attempting to "tweak" my website, and I hope yall like the subtle changes. I am trying to be user-friendly. And sometimes I get used, but MOST times I dont mind being used, depends upon what SHE looks like :)
"The LORD is near to ALL who call on HIM...in TRUTH." - PSALMS 145:18 -
Most of yall know that I was born and raised and that I LOVE Montgomery, and I LOVE THE STATE OF ALABAMA, not just sports. I have an outstanding Uncle Jimbo living in Prattville, but the REST of my family in Montgomery; SUCK! My brother is a FELON & my mother SHOULD BE. Long, LONG, very Very VERY sad Sad SAD story, but TRUE. I miss my LIFE and mostly I miss my FRIENDS in ALABAMA THE BEAUTIFUL. I am now living in "yankee-land" as I call it and I am very sad and alone living here. I run into TONS of people that are "IN-LOVE" with the ROMANTICISM of ALABAMA when I talk about it. The State of ALABAMA should PAY ME. I am a walking, talking tourism MAGNET. I should be a MAGNATE for THE STATE.
I graduated ROBERT E. LEE H.S. in 1985 at the age of 17, and joined the USAF at age 17. I am now disabled, and I DO have a great infrastructure if you will, here in yankee-land. I have great benefits, great insurance, great doctors (2 HOT ONES), and I have a SUPER apartment, in a VERY-LOW CRIME neighborhood. I MEAN WAY LOW. I feel like, HEY I SERVED MY COUNTRY, so I feel I DESERVE and have EARNED the good things that I DO HAVE now. I HATE the freaking COLD WEATHER, but it made it to 79 today. I wish it was 110 everyday just to PI$$ the yankees off. I would LAUGH SO HARD at them. GLOBAL WARMING MY A$$.
Even THOUGH I have ZERO friends and ZERO family up here, heck I am not even allowed to have a CAT, even though, GOD HAS BLESSED ME BIG TIME for what little I do have. So I am VERY THANKFUL. My health is fading fast due to MY FAULTS, which include smoking. I guess I am in a sort of DENIAL stage right now, but I am smart enough to know what I NEED to do.
I was homeless for 7 months which included being homeless in Montgomery, Elmore, Mobile, and for a time in Benton, PA. I stayed at the Salvation Army on Bell Street in Montgomery (I know it is gone now), but I WAS THE ONLY ONE IN THE BUILDING THAT HAS NEVER DONE CRACK. Dont worry, the ONLY things I do ARE LEGAL. I actually OWNED and HAD THE TITLE to a HOME in Montgomery, AND I WAS NOT ALLOWED TO LIVE THERE due to my EVIL MOTHER TELLING LIES. Do you know how BAD it SUCKS to OWN A HOUSE AND STILL BE HOMELESS??? And because of THE EVIL ONE, I dont own a car anymore either. And IT SUCKS walking in the COLD wind, rain, snow, ice, and freaking MUD. and I do mean COLD.
My DECORATED, ARMY VETERAN of WW II, JAMES JAY HILL...I called him DADDY HILL died in JAN of this year 2011, and not long before he died, I asked him HOW COME I DONT HAVE ANY FRIENDS IN YANKEE-LAND? And his answer was, "CUZ JAY, YOU MAKE PEOPLE FEEL STUPID!" Well, HE WAS CERTAINLY RIGHT. But it seems to me that 90% of AMERICANS thrive on BEING IGNORANT. People everywhere JUST DONT WANT TO HEAR IT. They "pretend" that if they DONT KNOW, then it wont affect them any.
"Suck it up, buttercup!" - Lauri DeRosier -
"HE answered their prayers, because they TRUSTED in HIM." - 1 CHRONICLES 5:20 -
Here is your ENGLISH lesson for the day: The Chinese word for GOOD is HAO.
Because of ALL the THOUSANDS of HOURS I have logged by taking my EVIL MOTHER to the Emergency Rooms in and around Montgomery & Birmingham & Prattville, most everyone that KNOWS me KNOWS that I AM THE MOST PATIENT MAN IN THE WORLD.
So yall take a break, but hurry up & come back & finish reading this, before I GET IMPATIENT :)
Infinite patience produces immediate results.
Play THESE numbers on the ALABAMA LOTTERY, and I PROMISE you WILL WIN ALL THE MONEY TODAY: 5 14 38 28 44 7.
"HE will respond to the DESTITUTE; HE will NOT despise their PLEA." - PSALMS 102:17 -
"I dont want marriage counseling, you would RIP ME to SHREDS." - Kelly J. VANDERGRIFT -
"The prayer of the upright pleases (the LORD)." - PROVERBS 15:8 -
Thoughts become things. They manifest in our minds. Better to THINK POSITIVE!
"The LORD...HEARS the prayer of the RIGHTEOUS." - PROVERBS 15:29 -
Another short prayer from JAY VAN...Dear LORD, PLEASE make a life-changing difference for all the suffering people in ISRAEL and in the UNITED STATES. AMEN.
The latest COSTLY obama health-care study says for you to wear AMBER around your neck (beads, or a pendant) to ward off a cold or the flu. I dont make the news, I just report it. :)
INSULT OF THE DAY: YOU MAKE ME believe in reincarnation. NOBODY can be AS STUPID AS YOU in ONE lifetime.
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up." - Mark Twain -
Somebody LIED to me, I was told that it was SAMUEL CLEMENS that said that!
JAY VAN wonders how many people will "catch" that? If you do "catch" it, please let me know :)
April is KEEP AMERICA BEAUTIFUL MONTH. That means we have 5 more days to clean it up. If you are lucky enough to be reading this, please DO YOUR PART...throw a DUMBOCRAT in the NEAREST DUMPSTER PLEASE.
"Ability can take you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there." - BEAR BRYANT -
"That MEANS, the AUBs WONT be 'there' very long." - JAY VAN -
I dont know HOW they found this out, but a MAYO CLINIC Health Study shows that sleeping with TOO MUCH LIGHT in your bedroom raises your risk of breast cancer by 22%. What happens if you sleep on the couch in the living room?
Way back in 1901, (I think we had snow that year), New York became the 1st state to require that cars have license plates. The YANKEES from New York had TRIED putting license plates on their horses, but the GOOD PEOPLE OF ALABAMA emailed them via telegraph and told them TO STOP TRYING IT. After that WARNING, the death toll of YANKEES being KICKED TO DEATH went down SIGNIFICANTLY. THANKS BAMA.
JAY VAN wanted to SAVE his marriage, but his wife Kelly QUAILED.
You are BLESSED with the FREEDOM to THINK as you please. Use it wisely.
"I DONT want a DIVORCE Kelly, but IF we are going to get divorced, why cant we have one like Lauri and Paul?" - JAY VAN -
It is always good luck for your business to have SOMETHING SILVER on your desk.
JAY VAN keeps CRIMSON on his desk, and it ALWAYS brings me LUCK.
INSULT OF THE DAY: YOU are PROOF that EVOLUTION CAN go in REVERSE!
"Whatever you are, be a good one." - Abraham Lincoln -
"Words should be WEIGHED, NOT counted." - Webster -
UAB Health Research Study SHOWS that children involved with music lessons will have BETTER brain functions as older adults when they grow up.
DUH!! JAY VAN played trumpet since 7th grade & was in glee club in 10th. I dont watch the show GLEE, but have seen previews. UNLIKE the liberal tv show, WE DID NOT have any sexually-oriented/challenged people in MY GLEE CLUB at ROBERT E. LEE H.S.
JAY VAN does NOT CARE what you do in your private bedroom, but STOP shoving it down our throats on TV. LESS than 2% of ALL AMERICANS are "GAY". More than 90% of our TV shows include "gay" characters. Why dont they make the shows REFLECT the TRUE NUMBERS on TV?
Did you throw your LIBERAL DUMBOCRATS AWAY YET?
JAY VAN LOVES horror movies, thrillers, suspense, science-fiction, fantasy style tv shows, movies, and books. Mysteries too. But has ANYONE but me NOTICED LATELY that every tv show or movie contains VOMITING and/or THROWING-UP? JAY VAN DOESNT MIND blood, guts, and gore, but DAMN, enough with the PUKING. All they have to do is HINT at it for us to GET IT. I dont Dont DONT, REPEAT, DO NOT WANT TO HEAR IT OR SEE IT. The other night, I saw VOMIT SCENES 3 times, on 3 different tv shows, WITHIN 15 MINS. of each other. And I AM NOT exaggerating. And all I have is BASIC CABLE. I have NO PAY CHANNELS. Jeesh.
"For the LORD taketh pleasure in HIS people: HE will beautify the meek with salvation." - PSALMS 149:4 -
"See? You dont need me and never did. You just wanted someone to play with and well, play with whomever you want JAY. HAPPY EASTER, my MICHAEL JAY. We could have had a nice life. Oh well. Hope you ENJOY your Easter ALONE and your life ALONE. I am outta here. You never have to worry nothing about me anymore. Your decision on that and if you could, please give my house key to andrew and have him drop it off or his wife to drop it off. Otherwise mail it or throw it away. Up to you but please let me know what you did with it so I know. Thanks. You owe me that much anyway. GOOD BYE JAY. I am gonna miss you sometimes. I hope someday you will miss me too. So long. Your KELLY-BABY." - Kelly J. VANDERGRIFT -
"What a SPREAD of CROCK that is!!!!!" - JAY VAN -
ENGLISH LESSON OF THE DAY: Bi-Polar and/or BorderLine Personality Disorder.
Just so yall know, THE ONLY TIME I EVER used her key was ONCE, and that was THE DAY she gave it to me AT HER APARTMENT, with HER PRESENT, and all I did was TEST IT to see if it would work. She had AMPLE chances to come get it, but she is NOT ALLOWED to DRIVE her OWN car due to her oldest son (a very good driver) and her EX-Husband. Her CURRENT husband isnt allowed to drive it either DUE TO THEM. And NOW, according to her, it has been REPO'd.
She cant even take her YOUNGEST, MINOR SON to the DENTIST because of THEM 2 ADULT MEN. That PROFESS to LOVE her SO MUCH. ha Ha HA. WAKE UP PEOPLE.
Will the COMMON-SENSE INTELLIGENT PEOPLE READING THIS....please EXPLAIN to me HOW I can be "controlling" since we HAVE NOT LIVED TOGETHER SINCE 2007? I have NO SAY in WHAT, WHERE, WHEN, and HOW she does things and WHO she does things with. Even when we were on GOOD TERMS, she WOULD NOT convey, communicate, or tell me anything via text, instant messenger, emails, OR phone calls. When we DID talk on the phone or on IM, she would HANG-UP WHEN SHE DIDNT WANNA HEAR IT. So HOW in the HADES is THAT controlling? Please advise.
I love my wife and I am proud of her for doing so well in college online. She is taking classes to HELP PEOPLE AVOID the SAME THING she is DISHING OUT. Her cloudy is judgement and skewed. Her negative is thinking. No forgiveness for ability. I consistently and constantly THUNK about her 24/7 and did things FOR HER 24/7. I had to BEG her to tell me anything, something. Sometimes it would have been easier to carry on a conversation with a POISONED OAK TREE IN TOOMER'S CORNER. Except EXCEPT for the QUACKER-STATE OF PA, has ANYONE in ANY STATE reading this right now ever heard of a DIVORCE CLINIC WHILE GOING TO GROUP THERAPY? I thought not. You go to GROUP THERAPY to get help and the LEAD QUACKER asks the CIRCLE in THE GROUP...HEY DOES ANYONE WANT TO GET DIVORCED TODAY? and one idiot raises her hand and then the next, and then they go in a room, and the PRO BONO attorney already HAS the papers splayed out and all they have to do is fill in the blanks. And THEN THEY want to MAKE ME PAY ATTORNEY FEES AND COURT COSTS.
I rescued and helped my wife ESCAPE benton, PA TWICE and showed her and taught her WHAT LIFE WAS ALL ABOUT. HOW TO HAVE FUN, showed her all around ALABAMA, took her to BAMA GAMES, BISCUITS GAMES, the BEST FOOD ON EARTH, the NICEST PEOPLE ON EARTH, THE BEST WEATHER, BEST LOOKING GIRLS, ETC. Now due to her family and EX-family SCREWING her to death AND ALL THEY DO IS take Take TAKE and TAKE some MORE. She now WANTS me to be MISERABLE, when I was PERFECTLY HAPPY AND CONTENT HAVING ONLY HER IN MY LIFE. I gave her all the extra money I had and bought her and her kids food. Gave her gas money ABOVE AND BEYOND what a taxi would cost me. I bought her gifts and presents FOR NO REASON BUT LOVE and for SURPRISES. I STAYED AWAY from her apartment to KEEP THE PEACE as to not NOT cause a conflict with the 2 sorriest excuses of male human-beings you HAVE EVER SEEN.
You want PROOF of how much I LOVE HER...I went AGAINST MY RELIGION and bought her and had shipped to her FRONT DOOR, a GREEN ALABAMA CRIMSON TIDE T-SHIRT. Only BECAUSE GREEN is her FAV COLOR. CRIMSON was/is her 2nd fav or it was.
That is BONA-FIDE PROOF OF MY LOVE. I would NOT have done THAT for anybody else on the planet. And there was no special day or special occasion when I did THAT for her. Just a regular day. I got to see her wear it ONE TIME, and that was all :(
Make a wish on the first bird you see on or after your birthday. Your wish will come true within the year.
INSULT OF THE DAY: I bet your mind-reader only charges YOU half-price.
"It is a WISE father/mother that KNOWS his/her own child." - William Shakespeare -
"A merry heart doeth good like medicine." - PROVERBS 17:22 -
"A good scare is more helpful than good advice." - Edgar Allan Poe - (or is it Allen?) my bad if I speeled it wrong. Sorry.
University of Pennsylvania Health Study shows that drinks like SLIM-SLOW that contain SEAWEED FIBER will help DELAY your feelings of HUNGER. (no comment.)
THINK POSITIVE: (some people NEED to). DEMAND what YOU WANT from life. Only YOU have control Control CONTROL over YOU, NOT ANYONE ELSE. Put THAT in your smoke-clinic and divorce it.
In reference to #58 above...Sir William Shakespeare was born in 1564 (I think we had SNOW that year). He died 52 years later after writing 38 plays.
JAY VAN has been toying around with writing a play. It would start out by having an 18+ year old SON, call his MOTHER via telephone on CHRISTMAS DAY and the SON says to his LOVING MOTHER..."BITCH, IF YOU DONT WIRE ME $1,500.00 DOLLARS TODAY, I WILL NEVER TALK TO YOU AGAIN!" I mentioned the idea to my grandmother MAMA HILL and her exact EXACT words would have been..."SO LONG SON!" But in my idea for the play, the MOTHER gets the money from her NEW HUSBAND IN ALABAMA and then she DOES WIRE THE MONEY. What would YOUR mother say or do? I bet I could get ONE MILLION MOMS TO REPLY AND NOT ONE would have WIRED IT, NOT A SINGLE ONE. Oh wow, I just noticed that this is #64. How appropo is that?
"The TROUBLES of MY HEART are ENLARGED. O' bring thou me out of MY distresses." - PSALMS 25:17 - AMEN.
TRAVEL TIP: Tie a yellow string around your ankle before you leave on a journey to protect you from harm along the way. JAY VAN HAS NEVER HAD A CAR ACCIDENT OR WRECK WHILE DRIVING, and I only use CRIMSON STRING. :)
INSULT OF THE DAY: Yo' momma's SO FAT, people JUMP over her rather than go the long way around.
"GOD not only plays dice, he throws them in the corner where you cant see them." - Stephen Hawking -
JAY VAN gives girls FERVID feelings of pleasure. (I have references to prove it.)
Be open-minded when a friend lets you down -- IF they have a VERY GOOD explanation.
Well, it IS baseball season, and way back in 1876 (I think we had SNOW that year), the Boston Red Stockings beat the Philadelphia Athletics in the very first National League Baseball Game.
"Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it is in your power to act. Do not say to your neighbor, 'Come back later; I'll give it tomorrow' - when you now have it with you." - PROVERBS 3:27-28 -
Hang a sprig of rosemary over a newborn's crib to ensure a life of good health.
"2 are better than 1, because THEY have a good return for their work." - ECCLESIASTES 4:9 - (That Bible Verse is also the MOTTO of JOHN & BARRY at http://www.sportsradio740.com/ )
THINK POSITIVE: YOU are confident! That is how you ROLL!! Make it YOUR day!!!
INSULT OF THE DAY: What happened? Did someone put a STOP PAYMENT on your REALITY CHECK??
WOOHOO, #77, my jersey number from playing Right Tackle in football.
For those of US who WISH to REMAIN married like myself, LOVE TIP OF THE DAY: Remind yourselveS of ALL the GOOD TIMES STILL to COME. Make a DREAM BOOK of things you WISH TO DO TOGETHER IN THE FUTURE.
"Gray skies are only just clouds PASSING over." - Duke Ellington -
"Growing OLD is MANDATORY. Growing UP is OPTIONAL." - John Hamilton -
obama Health Care Study shows that having the MONONUCLEOSIS VIRUS AND limited SUN EXPOSURE will raise your risk of contracting MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS.
The hospital in VANDERGRIFT, PA (it is a REAL city) has released a HEALTH STUDY that finds that GIRLS EXPOSED TO JAY VAN have a 100% chance of getting and having MULTIPLE O's. The VANDERGRIFT, PA HOSPITAL has a LIST OF WINNERS provided upon request.
Women that plot, plan, and connive are a CABAL.
"I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with MY RIGHTEOUS RIGHT HAND." - ISAIAH 41:10 -
For a FREE DESSERT TODAY, the SECRET WORD IS: BEAR.
It is BAD LUCK to place a glass on top of anything purple.
INSULT OF THE DAY: No WONDER you're a team player. There's NO CHANCE you'd EVER develop a PERSONALITY ON YOUR OWN.
"The ONLY thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money." - Johnny Carson -
"LISTEN carefully, especially when you talk about yourself." - Helen Keller -
"When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world." - John Muir -
MOST AUBs have INCHOATE brains and personalities.
"Your FATHER knoweth what things you have NEED of BEFORE you ASK HIM." - MATTHEW 6:8 -
IF you ever break a LAMP, walk quickly in a CLOCKWISE circle around it to keep the bad luck away.
INSULT OF THE DAY: I dont know WHAT your problem is, but I bet it is HARD to pronounce.
"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." - Andy Warhol -
UAB Health Researchers have found an INCREASE in KIDNEY DAMAGE for patients that take the weight-loss drug ORLISTAT. I also saw that on FOX NEWS CHANNEL. F*CK CNN. (sorry couldnt resist).
IF you BUY a lottery ticket using money that you just FOUND, you have a BETTER chance of winning. - Gamblers Anon HandBook Step #1 -
"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who FEARS the LORD is to be PRAISED." - PROVERBS 31:30 -
POSITIVE THINKING - FAKE IT till you MAKE IT. If you struggle with being confident or HAPPY, then FAKE IT, and IT WILL MANIFEST TRUE. (this is VERY TRUE YALL).
INSULT OF THE DAY: Why dont you GO BACK to the PETRI DISH where your parents met?
"A little NONSENSE now and then is RELISHED by the WISEST MEN." - Ronald Dahl -
DITTO on #101. I love wording around with plays. I usually kill 2 stones with 1 bird.
IF my wife makes me have to TESTIFY in court, I am going to REMONSTRATE every chance I get.
One of the greatest mistakes in life is to live as if you fear making mistakes.
On this day in 1986, APR 26th, a MISTAKE was made during an EXPERIMENT at the Chernobyl nuclear power station which caused an explosion that killed DOZENS to start with.
"I WISH above ALL THINGS that thou mayest PROSPER and be in health, even AS THY SOUL prospereth." - 3 JOHN 1:2 -
#106 is my PRAYER FOR YOU ALL THIS DAY, and that is enough for today as well.
I STILL LOVE, WANT, AND NEED MY WIFE, MY KELLY-BABY. PERIOD.
- END FOR TODAY -
thanks for reading yall :)

JAYVANBAMAFAN

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

PRAYER, QUOTES, & DESIGNS FOR TUE 4-26-11

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